| If you are a martial arts instructor today, odds are that | | | | generate some laughs ourselves with these titles. |
| you began teaching classes for your instructor shortly | | | | In moving from a martial arts student to a martial arts |
| before or after you earned your black belt. You | | | | school owner, a few things may have happened to |
| became a good teacher, but you were still under the | | | | you as an assistant teacher. Your instructor may have |
| control of your instructor, and you loyally taught and | | | | been “overusing” you and taking advantage of |
| followed his syllabus. | | | | your loyalty. This is never pleasant, because you have |
| This is usually a great period in our lives. We can teach | | | | to face some cold, hard realities, and your relationship |
| without risk but, more importantly, we have gained | | | | with your instructor begins to change. Your spouse, |
| control of a very important part of our new life and | | | | family, or friends may have suggested that you were |
| are in a position of power. People bow to us and call | | | | being exploited. They may have urged you to open |
| us Mr. or Ms. or a title of some sort that we associate | | | | your own martial arts school. Perhaps even a student |
| with prestige, such as “Sensei.” That’s a big | | | | offered to back you financially. |
| turnaround for many of us. That is the beauty of the | | | | Being loyal, you decided to be upfront with your |
| martial arts. The arts provide you with a healthy way | | | | instructor and tell him you were considering opening a |
| of redefining yourself and your future. | | | | school. What was his reaction? Either he went for |
| I was an 18-year-old bus boy clearing tables in a | | | | your throat or insisted you pay him a percentage of |
| restaurant during the day and Mr. Graden, black belt | | | | your lifetime earnings. |
| teacher, at night. My days were filled with, “Graden, | | | | Why did he react that way? Odds are, because he |
| clear off table six, fast!” My nights were, “Mr. | | | | went through the same cycle of moving from no |
| Graden, would you please speak to my son? He’s | | | | control to total control about a decade before you, and |
| having trouble in school, and he looks up to you so | | | | then you threatened that control. He had you, his |
| much . . .” Which do you think appealed to me and | | | | golden child, teaching classes. You symbolized his |
| fueled my ambition? | | | | success as an instructor, but now you were making |
| If you started your training in the 1970s, or maybe even | | | | the biggest decision in your martial arts life without his |
| the 1980s, because of the Kung Fu TV show and the | | | | control? Not without a fight you weren’t. |
| many Kung Fu movies, there was what I call an | | | | This is often the beginning of the end of your |
| “implied wisdom” in earning a black belt. As a | | | | relationship with your instructor. If he can’t control |
| black belt, especially a “master,” you were | | | | you, he may perceive you as disloyal. Does this sound |
| perceived as somehow knowing more about life than | | | | familiar? “I taught you everything you know. You |
| the average person. This image of the martial arts | | | | owe me! How dare you take what I taught you and |
| master as being a master of life was reinforced by | | | | use it against me?” Mind you, he will probably view |
| the martial arts movies, television shows, and | | | | anything less than totally capitulating to his demands as |
| magazines. | | | | working against him. |
| To this day, that prestige has tremendous pull and | | | | Contrast this with a college professor. If you attend |
| attraction for martial artists. Why do you think black | | | | law school, your law professor wants nothing more |
| belts seem in such a rush to call themselves Master, | | | | than for you to go out and be successful using what |
| Grand Master, Senior Master, or Supreme Grand | | | | he taught you. That is his reward. He doesn’t ask |
| Master? In the real world we have master mechanics, | | | | for a percentage of your revenue. |
| master sergeants, chess masters, and even chess | | | | One school owner would bring each student into his |
| grandmasters, but only martial artists insist on actually | | | | office right before he tested for black belt. He pulled a |
| being called “Master.” | | | | .38 revolver out of his drawer, set it on the desk, and |
| On the popular TV show Seinfeld, a small-time | | | | explained, “Just to be clear. You will never, ever |
| conductor insisted everyone, including his girlfriend, call | | | | open a martial arts school in my area. Understood? |
| him "maestro." I wonder if sometimes we don't | | | | |